I Won't Forgive You
by The Queen of Double Standards
Summary: "I won't forgive you if...", followed by a requirement, were the words constantly shared between Gakupo and Gumi. So, when Gakupo went to fight in the war, Gumi left him with the parting words, "I won't forgive you if you don't come back."


**Author's Note: For SwirlsOfInk**

**I Won't Forgive You**

They didn't have an anniversary to celebrate, and, in the same such way, they couldn't quite say how long they'd been dating. They'd been childhood friends since birth, and, as they'd grown up, it had simply been mutually understood that they were a couple. There was no point which they could determine as the point that they started dating; in fact, Gumi had once asked Gakupo when they'd first kissed, but neither could recall. Their relationship was simply that. They blended perfectly, even if they'd have spats every now and then, and they were so in love that nothing else seemed to matter particularly. They might even have been engaged; Gumi wore a toy ring on the ring finger of her right hand daily, and, as with the first kiss, neither she nor Gakupo could recall with any certainty when he'd given it to her, but that ring held their promise all the same.

"Hey, Gumi," he'd murmur to her once in a while as they sat on the couch of her basement, gazing at the television in the darkness. She'd look to him, the television sparkling in her curious eyes, and he'd smile at her beauty, the beauty of her unwashed, unkempt hair and makeup-less face. "I won't forgive you if you take off that ring."

She'd smile teasingly and would reply, "I won't forgive you if you don't go get me some snacks," or something of the kind. And, because neither of them wished to never be forgiven, they'd follow their lover's instructions to a T.

On other days, they'd be heading out somewhere, Gakupo holding the passenger seat's door open for his beloved as she'd recall how sweet of a guy he was, and she'd tell him with an impish grin, "I won't forgive you if you make me carsick."

"I won't forgive you if you turn around to look at the hot shirtless guy who's coming up behind you," he'd reply with a mischievous glint in his eyes. Gumi would feed into his lure and look behind herself, painfully curiously, only to see that there'd be no one there. She'd turn back to him with a scowl, and he'd grin and allow her to enter the car. However, when he would begin driving, he'd be sure to make his driving jerky and abrupt, ensuring that his beloved would glare at him again with a pout on her face as the sickness became present.

Some days, they'd be doing nothing in particular, and Gumi would pipe up, "Hey, Gakupo?" When he'd let out a small grunt in response, she'd continue, "I'm bored, and I won't forgive you if you don't entertain me." She'd loll her head toward him and look at him with her green gaze, and he'd smile sweetly and kiss her forehead. She'd close her eyes, embarrassed by his forwardness, and then would open them again to look at him from so close up.

"Where do you want to go?" he'd wonder, smiling sweetly at her. Then, when she opened her mouth to respond, he would add, "But I won't forgive you if you say you want to go to the movies again. We've already seen every single one that's playing."

With that sparkle of mirth in her gaze, she'd respond, "I guess I won't be forgiven, then," and he'd laugh and pull her into a hug, his lanky arms wrapping around her and her ear would press against his heart to feel it speed up just a little bit. She'd close her eyes and smile peacefully, breathing, "I love you."

Gakupo would laugh then, the sound resonating in his chest as Gumi listened closely, and say, "Fine. If it means that much to you, we can go to a movie. I'll forgive you."

She'd giggle at his response, knowing that that wasn't what she meant in her final words, but she'd play along anyway, happy as long as she got to spend time with him.

There were days when he'd be sick, and she'd sit around her house without knowing what to do. He was her whole life, everything in her world, her best friend. When he was unavailable, she felt completely useless and bored. She'd try texting him, but he'd probably be asleep or something similar. So she'd look through their past messages, yearning for him. Eventually, when she'd run out of other things to keep her mind busy, she'd go over to his house and knock on the door, ring the doorbell, and try to make her way inside, but the door would be locked, and he wouldn't respond. So she'd plop down against his door and send a text message.

GUMI: If you don't let me in, I'll never forgive you.

Moments would pass, and she'd lean her head against his door and wait in silence. She'd look to the sky, be it grey or blue or brown or black. On some days, he'd simply come and get the door, and she'd smile at him. She'd try to kiss him, and he'd say, "I won't forgive you if you get yourself sick," with a smile as he softly covered her lips with his forefingers, pushing her softly back. She'd pout at him and kiss him anyway. However, on other days, his response would be different, and she'd simply get a text in reply.

GAKUPO: I'm sorry. Kaito is avoiding me again and it's really gotten to me. I don't know why I still want to be friends with him when he keeps screwing me over but I do. I'm sorry but I really need to be alone.

Those were the days when he would misconstrue 'let me in', but they were the best times for her. She'd close her eyes and hold the phone to her chest, feeling so loved in knowing that he trusted her enough to tell her how he was feeling. Then, she'd send him one last text and head home.

GUMI: Okay. I'm sorry, love. Thank care of yourself. I love you.

There were worse days, as well, when Gumi would be shouting at Gakupo for whatever had happened to upset her, and he'd be shouting in return. He'd say something that stung her sharper than he'd meant it to, and they'd both fall quiet. She'd look at him with eyes filled to the brim with tears, and his heart would begin to melt, but that wasn't fair. It was manipulative, and they both knew it. So, angrily, he'd looked away from her pained face and tell her, "I won't forgive you if you cry."

She'd flinch and draw back, bowing her head so that her bangs covered her teary eyes. Then, she'd turn and head out the door, only stopping to murmur, "I won't forgive you if you don't come talk to me or call me later." Then, she'd go, stopping herself from crying, and sit in her room for a while, staring at her phone. Eventually, the phone would ring, or the doorbell would sound, and there he'd be, waiting to clear things up.

There were also times when he didn't come, though, and she'd grow tired of waiting and would go see him instead. The outcome for that was always the same: there he'd be waiting with that look that told her he was ready to talk, even if neither was quite ready to accept responsibility. Still, they'd get past it, because, if love's there, there's nothing that can't be overcome.

There was one time, and this time only happened once, that she'd been waiting at home for Gakupo to arrive as he'd promised, and he came to her with a solemn look on his face. She knew him well, so she panicked immediately, ran to him and hugged him and then asked what was wrong. He'd forced a smiled then, but she could tell how fake it was. Eventually, he sat her down and explained to her that he had to be sent off to fight for the country's defence. He was the prime age, he told her, and they needed him. He told her he could still refuse, though, and that he just might, because he didn't want to leave her. She fell silent for a moment because forcing a smile herself and saying that they both knew that he should go. They fell silent in mutual unhappiness at their decision, but neither could speak out properly. It was his job for his country. It hurt, but their love could survive the time apart.

He wrapped his arm around her and pulled her close as she quietly began to cry, not thinking of the time apart but thinking instead of what might happen to him if he was out there. Softly, she choked out, "I won't forgive you if you don't come back."

He was quiet for a moment before he murmured, "I won't forgive myself, either."

Another moment happened just once, when she ran to kiss him one last time before he boarded the train. They exchanged words of love, promises that he'd return, and swore to always love each other and to wait. Well, Gumi swore to wait. Gakupo, after another quiet moment, begged her not to. She was stung and looked at his resigned eyes for a long moment before looking down and falling to her knees to sob. He kneeled down and whispered promises to return to her, stroking her back and kissing her forehead. Through her sobs, she managed to promise, "You better, Gakupo. I'll never forgive you if you don't, okay? Never ever. I love you."

He pressed his forehead against hers, breathing in her scent as she breathed in his, engulfing themselves in each other for that one last moment. "I will. I'll come back to you. I love you too much to lose you."

They were given no more time than that. The conductor shouted that the train was about to leave, so Gakupo kissed her forehead one last time before going onto that train, smiling and staring at her all the while. For a reason she couldn't understand, she chased after that train. Her resolve was gone, and she didn't want him to go. She shouted at him, and then stopped when the train station blocked her with a railing that indicated her ending. She watched the train go, tears in her eyes and on her face, until it was out of sight. Then, finally, she gave in and went home.

When the phone rang, Gumi answered it to a broken promise. She was told that he'd never come back, at least not in soul. For the first time, their ritual words meant something. She'd never be able to forgive him. He'd promised to come back, but he'd broken that promise. She whispered to him in the world where he no longer was, "I'll never forgive you," followed immediately by, "I'll never stop waiting, because I love you. I promised never to forgive you, so I won't forgive you until you come back." And she cried, because she knew he couldn't come back, and that she couldn't forgive him this time.

**Author's Note: Different type of writing with this one, as well, so lemme know what you thought. I'm also participating in NaNoWriMo this month so I'll be pretty much gone till December. Well, till then, hope you enjoyed this story!**


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